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A FULL AND VARIED LIFE
If you are keen on self-destruction with a
masochistic bent,
If you like to bang your head so hard you give
your walls a dent,
If every 'Fancy' rule of Council springs to
mind without a thought,
If frantic, frenzied planning never
makes you overwrought,
If you would like to know how it feels to
be full of woe and strife,
Then you can be a cat show manager
with a 'full and varied life'
You may see your show hall
rental rising even faster than a rocket,
And although you claim
expenses you are always out of pocket,
Your exhibitors send
entries that no one on Earth can read,
They leave out 'male or
female', 'sire or dam' or even 'breed'
They ring weeks after
closing date to try and make your Show,
But you grit your teeth
and charmingly tell them where to go,
If a postal strike or
printer's strike make you full of woe and strife,
Now you've
become a cat show manager with a 'full and varied life'.
Of
course there may be certain judges who 'forget' your invitation,
You're
left wondering 'will they?-won't they?', you must have that information
Your head's so full of answers you say 'Hang on - what's the
question?'
And your stallholders all quibble at your tactful
site suggestion,
But eventually on show day you are calm,
composed and jolly,
'Til you hear someone's been flattened by a
runaway judge's trolley,
Your day is full of highs and lows and
questions by the score,
'Til finally at 5pm they are streaming
through the door,
But you've coped and you've forgotten all
about that woe and strife,
You have been a cat show manager with
a 'full and varied life'.